“Well I’m 20 years old & my boyfriend of 2 years is 27.. We have lived together for over a year now. We use to have crazy random sex at random places all the time but now we do it once or twice a week and its always the same thing in our bedroom. He tries and tries to make me wet but I just can’t get turned on anymore. I love him but I don’t know why he can’t turn me on. I miss having the crazy random times. What am I suppose to do? I bought new sexy outfits but we just can’t really get it spicey anymore :/”
Good sex isn’t just a product of the moment, it’s a product of polarity. Masculine and feminine energies are like the poles of a magnet. The further the distance between those two poles in any given moment, the greater the attraction and the greater the passion. When two people meet, the polarity between the two is at it’s maximum, which is why sex is so good, but as we grow and move in and live together, that polarity can be reduced and lost if the two people in the couple do not know how to inspire and maintain it. Physical attraction and passion come as a result of the distance between how feminine you are and how masculine he is in any given moment, coupled with moving energy from your dark side. I would suspect that what has happened between the two of you is that you both have become more energetically masculine, and neutral in your expression of energy, and if so, then there will be no polarity between you two, and thus, less or no sexual attraction. If you are in your mind, thinking about lots of things and trying to “solve” the problem of not being turned on anymore by buying more lingerie etc., then you are in your masculine – Which means he won’t be inspired to ravish you, and you won’t be inviting it. No polarity. You can buy all the sexy outfits that you want, but inspiring him to ravish you again comes from how energetically feminine you are and his attraction to what is INSIDE of you. That feminine energy. He wants to FEEL the overpowering feminine longing from within you with a challenge to “take” you like a man should. Your energetic position towards him should be powerful, yet, ready to surrender and totally consumed by your desires and saying, “Take me… Take me now, if you DARE”.
In order to have that fire again and push him into his masculine, you need allow yourself to trust him enough to let go, and relinquish your own masculine and fall completely into your feminine and “let go” of your mind. Moving into your feminine in relation to sex means surrendering. Not to him, but to yourself. It means surrendering to what is inside of you – your own love, your own darkness, your own sexual desires and your own feelings and longing to be “taken” by him in the moment. It means letting go inside of yourself and truly becoming, FOR REAL, that animal inside of yourself that wants crazy random sex and letting that take over your body, mind and soul. When you put on that sexy outfit, don’t put it on to turn him on, put it onto turn YOURSELF on. Don’t put it on to fix the problem and then question yourself and think “what if he doesn’t like this?” Instead, put it on and KNOW inside of yourself that it doesn’t matter if he does or not because he will not be able to resist the woman INSIDE the outfit, so it will be on the floor in seconds anyway. Get yourself out of your head and into your body. Do everything to turn yourself on and stoke that sexual fire within yourself. Put that outfit on because it makes your body sing. Feel the fabrics moving against your skin, love the colours, fill your mind, body and heart with imaginings of what he will do to you when he sees you in it, totally turned on and wanting him with every cell of your body. Allow yourself to feel sexy and hot and turned on, and surrender and let go and let those feelings flow out of you, like light shining from every pore, and then point that towards him as the object of your desire. Let how your body feels take you over and consume you as if him having sex with you is the only thing that will keep you alive. Because it is. Completely surrender to your sexual desires and longing, and to that raging, wild, hungry feeling within you and let it take you over completely. Use your words, your body and that overpowering energy within you to let him know how you feel, how turned on you are, and how much you want him to quench your fire – But only if he’s up to the task.
If he feels that coming from INSIDE you, for REAL, then you will already be turned on, and he will not be able to resist grabbing you, wherever you are, and taking you.